writing.as.amit

I have been thinking a lot recently about self-discipline and doing things I love. I want to understand why I need self-discipline to make myself do things that I love. There can be two reasons for this.

There's an inherent dichotomy between the things that I love and the things I want to believe I love. Maybe I don't love love journaling. Or meditating. But I want to believe I do. Hence, I need to fit these into my routine, or I just won't do it. On the other hand, I do love reading blogs and non-fiction. Or mysteries. So, I don't need a routine to make myself follow people's feeds. Or read books. If this is the case, how can I separate things that I love from those I want to believe I love?

Another reason might be that the things I love aren't easy for me to do. I haven't mastered how to meditate. Or to journal. They don't come naturally to me and hence, even a feeble friction — late nights or a busy work schedule or an unplanned travel — derails all my attempts to do any of these regularly. I need self-discipline to force myself to do such activities regularly (and patiently) as only through repetition will I master them. Only then would they start coming naturally to me.

I am yet to be convinced of the real reason. Maybe it is both; maybe neither. Whatever the case, I continue to force a routine on myself for I know of no other path to self-discipline.